I like my gringas...burnt to a crisp...

Super stressed, don´t want to talk about it. Anyway...

I went to the beach this weekend!!! Hello, Playas, Ecuador! It was nice to meet you, por fin. You are beautiful and weird and wonderful just like the majority of the other Ecuadorian oddities I encounter on a daily basis. Who knew that a 2 hour, $2.75 bus ride could´ve been just what I needed to relax. (Ugh, I´m so high-strung in this city...but I´m so irritated about it that I can´t even think about it or I might explode, literally...)

Anyway...the beach. Thank the Lord. Salt water, huge waves, beers at 11am..., random vendors selling sunglasses, dresses/clothes/shorts, encebollado on the beach, crickets made out of palm leaves, yanno, the usual. OH - and the sun. There was a lot of sun. Despite our repeated application of ¨bloqueador¨ (sun screen...)...we got FRIED. Absolutely and 100% fried. I almost had to call Peace Corps Nurse Kelly at 10pm when a compañera (Sarita!!!) got violently ill. It was just ridiculous how burnt we got. I can´t lay on my back or stomach. I take ibuprophen 4 times a day (yes, this coming from the weird girl who refuses to take medication...), I´ve applied 3 various kinds of aloe-based lotions/creams/gels repeatedly...it´s just insane. I hurt all over. It´s so dumb. My tattoos hate me (although, I must admit, they are the ONLY part of my body that I covered with sunscreen because I love them so much!) We could barely wake up to go with Bridge for her AIDS support group workshop in the morning because we were just SICK from the sun. So silly. Apparently living on the equator has it´s quirks...as if we didn´t know that before. I guess we just got another really painful lesson in equator-living......

Ahh, well, I had a nice weekend despite my serious burns.

OH ANOTHER CRAZY STORY.......

Checked my mail Thursday and YAY I got a letter from my brother Zak (thanks, Stinky Bubba!!!) and my Uncle Toby (thanks, Tobs!!) and a slip advising me that I have a package to pick up from my MAMA BEAR!!!!!!! Please, let me grace you all with the story.......

1.) I took the slip to the normal package pick-up window and am directed to the other part of the post office, around the corner

2.) I go there

3.) The guard at the door informs me that I need 2 copies (2? No idea why...) of my ¨cedula¨ (identification) and passport in order to enter the building

4.) I go make copies across the street and return to the guard...he signs some papers illegibly and unlocks the dumb secure door to let me upstairs

5.) I go upstairs, take a number, sit around and watch Sarah open amazing packages from her super awesome family (she got her packages with no problem because they were under 4 kilos...that is like the Peace Corps recommendation but my mom is just so cool that she can´t follow the rules....lolol, thanks mama!)

6.) Finally the guards let me cut in front of a bunch of people (I think...)...and I give my slips of paper to a young Ecuadorian lad sitting behind a glass window...he types some stuff in a computer and directs me to the customer service desk (yes, they actually have those here...se llama ¨servicio al cliente¨)

7.) I take another number, sit around some more, eat a Reese Cup from the good ol´ USA and lick the wrapper...(thanks, Sarah´s family!!!!!!), por fin I talk to the lady at the desk...she tells me that I have to accept the package and the ¨impuestos¨ (taxes) involved so I do that...

8.) She then tells me that the taxes are $70...

9.) I almost puke but compose myself just in time...

10). She also proceeds to tell me that I can´t pay at the post office, but instead I have to go to the bank (ANY bank...cualquiera...) to pay the money directly into the post office´s account (what??????)...so despite the fact that I´m a broke Peace Corps Volunteer, I go to the bank with all my jolly papers...

11.) I get my money out of the ATM and head to a bank where we proceed to wait in a line for 30 minutes (banks are ALWAYS ALWAYS packed full here...alwaysss)

12.) After joking with Sarah about how this probably isn´t even going to be a fruitful bank trip because I probably don´t have the correct papers...and after discussing a colon irrigation system with a strange man...IN ENGLISH...we get to the front desk at the bank and it´s our turn!!! YAY!!!

13.) That´s when I hear the following line: ¨Umm, you need another paper. We can´t process the payment with these ones...¨

14.) CHUZO!!!!!! Umm.......crud.........so we head back to the post office (I´m almost in tears at this point...)

15.) I talk to another bank worker and he tells me that I need to come back Monday because I have to wait 48 hours after the package was accepted to even print out the paper I need for the payment (wish I would´ve known that in the first place...thanks...)

16.) So I go home, explain this dumb story to anyone and everyone who will listen...and Ryan and I go back to the post office today (Monday, just like the guy told me) so get my package, por fin...HOWEVER, the nice bank man tells me that no one sent in a copy of my passport and cedula to Customs on Thursday when I went initially...

17.) He said he´d send it right away (ya mismo...)....and the punch line of the story??? I have to go back tomorrow............and repeat steps 1 - 12........

OMG, shoot me.

(*NOTE: I hope this post doesn´t discourage anyone from sending me packages!!!! There are only Customs issues like those mentioned above if they are over 4 pounds, that´s all. Mom just thought she was above the international mail rules. LOL Please feel free to send me anything! I have gotten several things/envelopes/packages/letters with no problems. My e-mail address is in the previous blog post and if you e-mail me I will send you my mailing address. Thank you for understanding...and following the rules so I don´t have to pay $70, 4 hours of my life, and lots of grey hairs just to pick up a packageee....)

I hope this gives everyone a little peek into my life. LOL Okay, so these things don´t happen everyday and they are perhaps not a fair representation of what I deal with...but this is it for me. This is that I have done in the past few days...

I´m living the dream, man. I´m enduring paradise...enduring paradise!!!!!

I love you, Guayaquil. I really do.

OMG - BY THE WAY - Happy 1 YEAR anniversary to Shadow and I today. This has been the craziest, most eventful, wonderful, insane, stressful, exciting, hardest, most profound, and satisfying year of my entire life. Thank you, Sugar. You are the best. I love you with all my heart. Come visit me now, dang it!!!! Come and keep me sane in this crazy place. I adore you. Un montón de besos...